Taking Care
by chaann
Summary: Deidara wants a headrub from Sasori. Kinda a pairing if you squint but not really but kinda but no but yes. Fluff drabble. First fic. / Now going to be a series featuring them!
1. Taking care: Rubs

My first fic on here heheh thought I'd keep it short and sweet hehe ok bye leave a review if you want idc

* * *

I find myself sitting on the couch, no longer basking in the daylight sun but in the light of the street lights. It's gotten to where all I want is for my Danna to come home.

Honestly at this point the biggest thing I want from him is a head rub. Danna has these big hands with long slender fingers that he uses for making puppets and having them perform. I find his shows so amusing, yet when I try to touch the puppets he swats me away. What a meanie. Sometime I wish the puppets would blow up.

However I don't want a show or for them to blow up, all I want is him to rub my head and miss his fingers in a golden hair. Too bad he's working late tonight.

!

I can hear the keys jingling as Danna unlocks the door. Now I have to make a quick decision, do I sit on the couch? Run to the door and greet him? Hide in our room in the dark? If I greet him and be a suck up, I have a better chance of getting that rub.

I get up carefully and with great grace walk over to the door, ready to greet my Danna home.

"Oh hey Deidara. Nice of you to greet me."

Danna leans foreword and pats me on the head briefly messing my hair with his super fingers. Definitely not long enough though and then makes his way to the kitchen holding as take out bag.

"How's some tuna for dinner?"

He's so perfect. His lovely red hair and dreamy brown eyes. I'm so glad he's mine and mine only and no one else can have him.

Here I can only let a loud cry of happiness as he makes my favorite food.

After we both get our fix of dinner I flop by my Danna's side, basking in the new heat that is his him as a whole. He is focused intensely on the tv, I take this as my chance so I nuzzle my face into his thigh.

Still focused on the tv, my Danna reaches his hand down to rub my head without second thought. Those large hands with their long slender fingers tussle my hair this way and that, but I can't be bothered to care. His hand moves around to the back of my neck and rubs there as well, slowly moving down. After moving back up to my head, a long slender finger makes its way to under my chin getting a sensitive area. I close my eyes in pure pleasure since this is too good. I'm literally purring he's so amazing.

After a good thirty minutes of rubbing, my Danna gets up removing me carefully from him and slipping a pillow in his place as if trying his best not to disturb me. He takes such good care of me...

He's so perfect and mine and no one else's.

I wander to our room where I can see him getting into his sleeping clothes. I crawl on the plush bed waiting for him to join me after he's done his before sleeping activities.

Danna crawls into bed and I crawl to him ready to snuggle. before lies down he pulls me to his warm chest sitting there running his fingers through my hair again. He doesn't have to say anything at this point, I know he loves me.

My Danna is so great and so sweet, I find myself leaning upward and giving him a soft kiss. Him being the wonderful Danna he is, he gives me a peck back before leaning over and shutting off the lamp and snuggling into bed.

I snuggle into my Danna's chest, completely soothed by the rub earlier until I hear:

"Ok Brat, I know you're a good kitty, so let's not have me wake up to dead rodent in my bed tomorrow ok?"

Pfft..Yeah right.

He takes care of me, I take care of him.


	2. Taking care: Food

I wrote another chapter hahah I'm sorry but stupid kitty deidara is very important.

* * *

Sometimes I worry about my Danna.

When he has a day off from work, he's always in his workshop making puppets. I think they're cool don't get me wrong yeah, but he should be paying attention to ME on his days off.

I'm getting off topic a little...

When he's cooped up in his room, it's more like he's trapped himself in there. It's unhealthy. Now me? I'm healthy. Danna said I could go outside but told me to be back before it got dark. I could spend much longer outside, but Danna trusts me to come home when he tells me to... So I will.

While outside you see yeah, I spent all my time in the garden behind our house. I chased a bird, chased a butterfly, ate some ladybugs, basked in the sun...you know, good outside healthy nice times. Danna should join me sometime..

Now I'm just sitting here on the window cill looking into Danna's workshop. The way he's hunched over is very unhealthy. The room is pretty dark saved by the fact he has this scary bright lamp over his desk... I doubt he's even eaten today!

I guess it's up to me to catch him a snack if he won't do it himself. It breaks my heart when he doesn't cate for himself. It seems though I never bring the right thing since he throws everything away! So what would he want? A bird? A squirrel? A mouse? I guess I'll have to check and see what's garden fresh...

I hop down the house and scamper all the way to the ground making my way to the garden. There really are a lot of options to pick from..

!

What is thaaaat!?

* * *

I walk around to the porch window where he's open it just wide enough for me to squeeze into when I'm ready to go inside. He thinks about me so much~ Now where do I put his snack? Maybe his shoe? No humans don't eat from their shoes, Danna wouldn't like that yeah.

I look around the kitchen where he keeps his food wondering where to put it. I cant get a dish out myself so maybe a dish that's already out..

Why hello there.

I hop on the forbidden counter and plop the snack into a warm cup filled with the stinky black stuff Danna drinks when he looks sleepy or when he wakes up. This is the one from this morning and it has stayed warm from sitting in the suns rays...just like me!

I'm so great. I made him a soup! I really should get him out here to eat though. Silly Danna doesn't know how to take care of himself, but that's alright cause he has me to do so yeah.

I saunter down the hallway to his work shop and begin clawing and whining and the door...he sure is taking his sweet time to pay attention to me. I really wish those puppets would just explode right now! I can hear his...unusually heavy footsteps? Oh! he must need his icky black drink! I hope he likes what I did to it!

"Back in the house already? Ah jeeze, What times is it?" Danna checks out his watch. I don't need a watch cause If you ask me, it's time for soup and then a snuggle. "It's noon... Wow I'm tired though, maybe I need a nap?"

Yes Danna have a nap with me and we can snuggle and I can groom you cause you didn't do a good job today. Sheesh Danna - look at your hair! It's awful!

"How about a snack first?"

Oh right the snack! Cuddles are always better with a full belly anyway.

Danna and I walk down the hallway to the kitchen, he does a couple stretches to probably fix his back...and he... Starts doing dishes? That's not a snack yeah! Oh wait. I can see him grabbing the cup! I can see he's going to finish off what was left before he washes it...

"DEIDARA WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?"

Bitter black snake soup duh.

Danna seems mad, so I guess I'll roll on my back and show him my belly. He'd be honored to pet me there. Like, I don't know what's wrong, all I did was cook for him!

"Don't you meow at me and expect a belly rub! I almost drank this!"

I know Danna, you should have drunk it...but all I can do here is try to talk some sense into him. Sometimes he acts like he doesn't even know what I'm talking about! Why can't he tell I did this to take care of him? I only want to take care of him like he does to me yeah!

Danna grumpily walks over and fills my bowl with dry food. Hm. I thought since I did such a good job I'd get wet food... He continues to stomp about and makes himself a sandwich. He then grabs the cup of snake soup and takes it outside and...dumps it in the compost!? My Danna can be such a baby, he could have just told me he doesn't like snake!

Sigh

I hope I can still groom him while he naps. He's such a mess! Really my job is never done.


	3. Taking care: Girls

This one is the longest one yet oooo. I'm up for requests/suggestions on Deidara's adventures, experiences, being with new characters and stupid things he could say.

* * *

I need a vacation...a vacation from worrying. It seems like these days it's all I do with my Danna!

From what he eats, to how he grooms himself to how much time he plays with me!

He fails at all those things at times, but what he really fails at is when he brings girls home. The thing is- HE SHOULDN'T. He comes home looking wiped and then proceeds to tell me he met a nice girl and he's going on a date with her this weekend! But this is how it generally goes afterwards...

They go out somewhere fun and the girl asks to come inside even though Danna doesn't want her to. He says he likes to..take things slow? I think he just wants her to leave so he can cuddle with me yeah. It's written all over his face and in his actions when he paces around the house muttering and carrying me. So full of love.

However I complain now because on our couch is a girl that drank too much and convinced Danna to let her stay the night. Now Danna is stuck waiting on her, bringing her little white treats and water. No fair yeah.

"Oh I didn't know you had a kitty!"

Her voice is shrill and loud. Wasn't she just complaining earlier how much pain she was in? Girls are weird. Danna should put this one outside to run in the garden to get rid of all that extra energy.

"Uh yeah, his name is Deidara.."

Yes that's me.

Deidara.

Danna's precious ONE and ONLY.

"Why is he like, looking at me like that?"

I'll tell you why I'm-

"Two reasons. One, you're sitting in his spot and two, he doesn't like new guests."

Ah hell yeah. My tail wiggles in happiness, that's my Danna. He knows me so well! I can't help but look at him dreamily..I should go catch him some snacks, he seems like he'd like chipmunks...

"Deidara, no." Danna says walking past me to the girl handing her a cold pack for her head. Maybe he doesn't like chipmunks after all...

"Here kitty kitty kitty~ if I'm in your spot you can sit with me!"

Ah hell no. If you ain't sick you GOTTA leave. This house can only love one girl and that's aunty Konan - and you're no aunty Konan. Aunty Konan brings me treats, gives super soft chest snuggles, and knits me little toys filled with that happy crazy fun stuff...

My sweet aunty thoughts are suddenly destroyed when this girl picks me up and pulls me to her lap. I'm in hell. Danna hasn't even held me today, sure I woke him up but she's taking away today's first snuggles! Abort abort abort! C'mon Danna, I've been giving you signals all morning this girl is useless! I'm so close to gnawing at her ankles...

"Uh yeah, I'd be careful holding him. If he doesn't know you he'll scratch...actually he'll scratch anyone.." And he's right little girl. I am the mighty Deidara! You better unhand me before I tear you to shreds and leave you crying yeah! Besides, you think you're good enough for my Danna? Think again! I'm here to protect him from icky girls like you! In fact I'm done with the girl - I'm going to the kitchen to see MY Danna so let me go!

I flop around tearing myself from her and begin to leave, unfortunately not making it very far , and a shrill laughter enters my ears, "Don't worry!" She squeals grabbing the scruff of my neck quickly leaving me paralyzed. The only thing I can show is a look of pure terror as the foolish girl drags me more to her lap, yeah.

"What are you- I don't think you should hold him like that." Danna marches over to her in his super cool tough guy way to hopefully my rescue. What do I mean hopefully? Of course he will! DannaDannaDannaDanna

"It's like, totally ok! I saw this in like a TV show about violent cats and - "

"He's not violent. I don't want you holding him like that." Danna reaches for me and swats the girls hand away; making her release me. I quickly scratch the girls hand and crawl up my Danna's arm clinging to his sweater sleeve, all the way up to his shoulder to perch and hiss at her. Danna puts a hand on my side, "He's shaking! Why would you do that to a poor cat? especially if it's someone else's." he sends her a nasty look.

Good question Danna. I'm not hers, I'm yours. Don't touch me ever again or I'll bite you lady. Danna is my superhero out to save me!

"What the hell? Oh my god! I wasn't hurting him, what are you like, a psychotic cat guy?"

"I love Deidara very much. He comes before all girls and I will not have someone treat him in such a way. It is my duty to take care of him. "

The girl stands ups quickly and grabs her coat and rushes to the door, "O.M.G you're such a cat freak, and to think I was gonna give you some! sheesh!" She reaches down and slips on her heels and marches out of our house.

He probably didn't want what she had to offer anyway.

Danna moves me from his shoulder to his arms. Really and sadly, I'm still shaking from when she grabbed me like that and I know Danna can tell yeah. He flops down onto his seat on the couch and holds me carefully is his strong arms - hands diving into my long golden hair that I just so happen to take great care of. He smells like his icky black drink and his face-fur removing cream, but that's ok cause that's the magical smell of my amazing Danna. I can't help but nuzzle into him feeling happy and safe now that its just the two of us again.

"Deidara, I'm sorry about that."

It's ok Danna, it's not your fault...just don't bring anymore girls home ever again.

"I'll really be more careful next time..." He begins to chuckle a little, "man I treat you like a little prince." and he tickles me under my chin and kisses the top of my head.

I'm royalty. I know. I'm the only prince you'll need yeah.

He sits up and looks at me, "How about some breakfast?"

Yes please! Wait - what did you mean by next time?!


	4. Taking care: Family

Yesterday during cuddle time, Danna told me that today Uncle Gaara was going to visit us. I have to let you know right here that uncle Gaara is pretty cool. Like Danna, Gaara is very calm and collect...in front of other people. When it's just the two of us and no one is around - they are both big softies all ready to play and cuddle. It's pretty obvious they're related.

Right now uncle Gaara and Danna are sitting around drinking their gross black water and some cakes that Uncle brought. Speaking of bringing things, he also brought a large piece of salmon for Danna to feed me-I mean to share...for dinner..

I like it when uncle Gaara sleeps over since we all share a bed in a great cuddlefest. Danna said something when I was little about them always sharing a bed when they were small and staying with ol hag chiyo. I wish Uncle came over more often so we could have more cuddle threesomes.

Uncle Gaara didn't come with Aunty temari or uncle kankuro which is pretty sad cause I like them too. Kankuro gives nice rubs and temari brings me treats. Ya know, I've come into a great family. Well everyone is nice but Chiyo. All she does is complain about my hair being everywhere, sitting on the furniture, bringing Danna treats...She also gets mad when I groom him and he lets me! He lets me groom him! Most of the time..that is... She doesn't even play with me. all she does is glare at me and she's always telling Danna to meet a girl and spend less time with me! I really don't like her.

Gaara is calling me over to sit between him and Danna and how could I refuse? Two snugly bugly red heads oh yes! I plop myself between them and roll on my back. Both reach in for my belly but stop to glare at each other as soon as they get there. What? No! Rub my belly! Your hands are there! Rub!

"Gaara, what do you think you're doing?"

Pet me?

"I called him over so I could pet him. What do you think you're doing?"

Pet me?

"I was going to pet MY cat. MY Deidara. The pet I take care of!"

Ok yeah so pet me Danna.

"Yeah then YOU should have called him first!"

Ok so no belly rubs?

"I thought it was a well known fact that someone can pet their own cat whenever they want!"

Oh so then start petting!

"Yes well I called him over to pet him! If you wanted to pet him you should have called him over. Besides he rolled on his back for me!"

I did?

"No he rolled on his back for me. LIKE HE ALWAYS DOES!"

I do?

"Yeah right! I've never seen him do it. EVER!"

Really?

"You little-"

Ok I'm out. I get up and saunter out of the room. I think Danna left the sliding door open. These two need to figure things out. I can here them finally notice I'm gone and start looking for me. By now I'm on the deck though so I think I'll play in the garden for a bit. Maybe they'll get working on dinner or go outside to waste some of thag energy.

But I can't help but feel a little giddy they were fighting over me hehehe. I have a pretty great family.


	5. Taking care: Play date

wow another one cool. This one has hidan but I didn't make him swear I just made him rude. Hopefully you can tell when Deidara is talking to hidan and when he's just telling the story. I didnt make it too obvious but you should get it. also everyone has seen a wet fluffy cat right? They're not fat. Just fluffy.

* * *

Danna announced this morning that it was play date day. The thing is I don't really like play date days. Don't get me wrong yeah, I love playing! It's just who I play with I have trouble being with.

I can see from the window the car pull up. It's pretty junky - not like Danna's pretty red car - and I can see the big fellow in it get out of it to open the back door and retrieve a white travel kennel.

I don't like either of them really. The man is rough and mean, and the cat is rude and always trying to pick a fight. Why can't Danna get me new friends? Just because meanie pants got him from the same place as Danna got me, doesn't mean we have to play together. Also, I really don't like it when he tries to mount me.

!

I jump from the knocking at the door. I must have spaced out a little oopsie. Danna trots over to the door rather quickly since he doesn't like making people wait and doesn't like to be kept waiting. Boy do I know that well. Sheesh.

"Hello Kakuzu." Danna bends down and looks in the kennel "Sup, Hidan."

You may think I could have gone into hiding when I heard they were coming but no, it's not that easy. Danna would have punished me in one way or another and Hidan would have tracked me down no matter what. I can never win on play dates. Danna thinks I have fun but I don't have fun. HOW could I have fun? It's Hidan and Kakuzu. I'd rather just play with Danna, Uncle Gaara and Aunty Konan. Lovely bunch they are.

Once they're in the house Kakuzu proceeds to bend down and let Hidan out. Hidan is a sleek, silver colored kitty with goofy pink eyes. Danna called Hidan a pretty kitty once, but after they left he told me how beautiful and how much nicer I was and gave me many kisses and said he loves me. So I win.

Hidan is a troubled kitty. He is always getting in trouble, breaking things (and blaming me) and self harming. Yup. You heard me yeah. A self harming kitty. I heard Danna and Kakuzu talking about how Hidans old family was a group of Jashinists and that they promoted violent self sacrifice and...hurting other living things and how it passed on to their cat. It scared me when playing with him at first how he would scratch himself till he bled, or would purposely fall off high furniture and not land on his feet. Hidan won't change his old collar either. Well, he'll change it as long as the old pendant gets put on. I feel bad that Kakuzu has to take care of such a naughty kitty. 'Sup loser.' Oh would you look at that yeah - he came over to me. I look over at Danna to see him setting up his video games to play with Kakuzu. I wish I could play with Danna like that too. I wish I could play everything with Danna.

'Heelllloooo in there?'

What, Hidan?

'Lets play with- it's back...'

What-

Both of our attention is stolen and we are now focused on the red dot on the wall beside us. I have never seen such a thing in my life! Look at it move! ...I wonder if I catch it.. maybe I can eat it...or give it to Danna. whatever works yeah.

It seems Hidan has the same idea as we both lunge for it, only to have it move so quickly and be somewhere else. I'm so embarrassed as I can hear and see Danna and Kakuzu watching and laughing at us, sharing something metal in their hands...whatever that metal thing is its not important yeah. I gotta get the red dot and besides, I'd like to see them catch the red thing since I bet they can't.

I watch as Hidan runs for it right into the wall with a big thud. Quite humorous if you ask me and It's ok because he has a thick empty skull.

Danna laughs at him, "Make sure Deidara doesn't do that. I don't want him getting hurt!"

Don't worry Danna, I won't run into the wall like the big stupid Hidan yeah. Besides, how could you two control where I run after the light? It's not like they're the ones making the light move. That's a silly idea.

Hidan and I chase the red dot for a little bit longer, but as soon as Danna and Kakuzu start playing games and stop focusing on us, the light stops... Weird.

'So fatty now what do you wanna do?'

Fat? Excuse me yeah?

'You heard me. You're getting fat fatty. Does your stupid Danna keep giving too many snacks and you take them like a needy greedy pig?'

Oh. No. You. Don't. I'm not fat yeah! I'm fluffy! Not faaat! Danna takes great care of me!

My feelings now are very hurt. I want my Danna to hold me! He doesn't think I'm fat does he? What if I AM fat? What happens if i sit on his lap and i crush him? Or jf I snuggle his chest while he's lying down and I suffocate him? Maybe Danna secretly makes fun of me when he's at work? Oh no what am I going to do yeah? Maybe I am fat! Who am I kidding? I must be fat!

Suddenly I feel a splash of water pour over me as Hidan knocked over a vase of flowers over me. I'm soaked! My hair is all flat and dark from the water yeah! I'm so upseeeet! I'm fat and stupid looking now!

Suddenly I see Danna bend down and swoops me up in a piece of cloth. It doesn't take me long to realize he took his shirt of and is now swaddling me in it. There are a few large pieces of broken glass, flowers and water all over the floor. It's no surprise he got to me this fast, this must have made a really loud and cool crash yeah! Too bad it all fell on me but thank goodness the vase broke beside and not on me.

Hidan must have had a great view..and laugh..

I look over at Hidan perched on the table being scolded by Kakuzu. He's soon doing the same thing that nasty lady tried with me and has him grabbed by the scruff of the neck while scolding. Good cause he deserves it yeah.

When I'm almost dry and my hair is all brushed, Danna fixes the ribbon on my head and gives me mega snuggles. Danna is seriously a way better care taker than Kakuzu that's for sure. I'm still even in his shirt! However Kakuzu got him a new one to wear. Tch. Hidan is sitting in his kennel all alone as punishment. Kakuzu even apologized and has offered to refill the new vase Danna buys with his own tap water. I'm not even a human and I'm sure that's not how it works.

'Hey so I guess you're not fat after all.'

What? Yeah! I told you I was just fluffy, Hidan!

'Yeah you're just a nasty furball!'

I jump to the direction of the kennel and let out a loud hiss before Danna can drag me back to his lap.

Ok these people have got to go! I'm so done with this play date! Hopefully Danna doesn't plan another for a long time... and by the looks on Danna and Kakuzu's face I'm sure they get what I mean!


	6. Taking care: Playtime

When Deidara says he sees colours like humans do (ex: sasori's red hair) I'm pretty sure cats don't actually see colours like humans do but ignore that. Deidara is special from the power of danna love.

* * *

Danna is late coming home today. He said yesterday AND this morning that he would be coming home early from work at around two. It's now three. He's late. whatever happened to not keeping people waiting?! What a hypocrite yeah! I'm stuck here in the house while he's out galavanting about- he better not be talking to girls!

Wait... I heard a noise... I have to get to the window to investigate and.. Yes yes yes he's home! AND THERE IS NO GIRL WITH HIM!

Ok he's getting out...Oh He's got a big bag of something! Did he bring home a snack? I love snacks. Even if he didn't he should give me a snack anyway yeah. I've been here waiting and being all worried so I better get one. If not, he's getting the silent treatment. I'll also wake him up really early tomorrow hehehe. That is - unless he redeems himself yeah.

!

"I'm hoome Deidara!"

Danna walks in the door with a big goofy grin and rushes to the couch to see me, but I'm still mad. Wait. Oh now he's showing me some sugar hugs and love..so ok this is nice! Why is he so happy? Did Chiyo die? Is that why he got off so early and was gone for an hour? Went to the funeral without me though? How rude yeah.

Danna hops up "Ok I will be right back so stay right here!" And with that he's gone and here I am back to waiting. Ugh. Humans.

"Ok brat I'm ready!"

However it doesn't appear that I'm waiting for long...oh..oh boy..oh..OH BOY. Danna is wearing his play time sweater! Which is - by the way - the sweater that Aunty Konan knit for him last year for his birthday! It's covered in my hair, but behind all of it is a black sweater with a big yellow kitty on it. I'm most certain that's me yeah. How could it not be me? I'm the best yellow kitty.

Danna rushes to the bag and flops down on the floor and grabs the bag and dumps out OH YAY! New toys and treaties and toys oh and look at that ooh I can't wait to play with that and that and that!

I see a new squeaky mouse toy , a stick with string that has a thingy on the end, a ball with a bell in it, a crackle noise toy, a new tunnel and another plush bird for my collection! I also see treats and a new ribbon..Danna sure went all out for this play day! I got pretty much all new toys!

Maybe he's dying.

Danna doesn't look like he's dying, But-

oh I want to chase that!

Danna starts off by tossing the ball with the bell and so while i play with it, he could take the tunnel out of the box in peace. It's ok I won't get in his way, I have a new jingle ball! Danna finishes opening the tunnel and grabs a treat from the bag and taunts me into running through to get it. Sounds fun. I'm in! Runrunrun-oh!

As soon as I'm at the treat Danna grabs me and tosses me around in him arms! Whee! Oh now he's holding me like a baby all ready for snugs.

"Good brat! Here's your treat."

Thank you Danna now lets play some more!

Danna quickly plops me on the ground and grabs the bird and mouse and gets on his belly and elbows. This can only mean trouble for Danna..

"Aaah! Oh no Deidara the bird and mouse have got meeee!"

Now we're ready to rumble! How dare they make my Danna suffer! The bird wiggles getting closer and closer to me...closer..closer...now...strike attack! The bird is strong but not as strong as me! Danna is here in peril and watching so I have to give it my all yeah! Oh man this bird is tough.. just like the other ones I have in my collection - it moves fast and is really strong! Outside birds aren't this fast, I've caught plenty to take back to Danna. This one will be nothing new! I can take down anything yeah! I do a harsh pounce in the bird and it falls to the floor in defeate of course since I am the great warrior Deidara!

Suddenly Danna rolls on his back and lets haggard cry and I see the mouse on his chest. That was the birds plan all along! While I'm busy fighting it, the mouse is beating up my Danna! How dare they! I run past the fallen bird and attack the mouse off Danna's chest, sinking my teeth into it while it lets out a squeak in distress. The battle is finished. I have taken both down and saved my Dan-NAH!

"Oh my hero! Thank you for saving me!"

Oh I love big hugs! However this kinda hurts..but..

"A kiss for my hero!"

OH. Kisses! You're welcome Danna! It's all in a days work fighting to save my most treasured ones!

He then hands me three treats yumyumyum. Playtime is always so much fun!

For the next thirty minutes or so Danna gets the stick-string-thingy and plays it with me. I got bored of it before he did, but I played a bit longer just for him yeah. Whatever makes him happy! I gotta take care of him and play what he wants sometimes.

Danna grabs the tunnel and moves it to my scratching post by the window and couch. He then grabs all my old gross broken toys and takes them to the trash and replaces then with the new ones. He however takes the stick thingy and places it on the table for later probably yeah. Danna then takes off my blue and grabs my hairbrush and calls me over for calm downs. I can see that next to him is one of the new ribbons and its black and red, very cool!

It seems playtime with Danna is ending for now though, but it's ok! He left the BEST toys out on the floor anyway. I can play with the bag and the tunnel box later!

* * *

Because isn't in common knowledge that you can buy your cat the best and most expensive toys but they will always rather play with the packaging?


	7. Taking care: Issues

This is for cheese pie sempai hey that's a rhyme.. hopefully you will all get my anime reference meow. This one is written a little different since no one talks. Also sasori is becoming more and more ooc. sasori is a crazy cat mom sorry. Hopefully he'll calm down soon...one day..maybe.

* * *

Danna is getting more and more worse every single day. About a week ago he spent most of his time at home crying in our room, on the couch, on the floor, and while eating. He has issues.

The thing that bothers me is what the issue is now, he's been crying over cat girls! I had a look at these cat girls and it's weird, like they are human girls with cat ears and tails, some are drawings and others are real girls yeah. The ones that don't wear clothes make him upset the most. Danna says kitties shouldn't act like that and proceeds to hold me and cry.

Now this was a week ago. Recently though Aunty Konan came by to visit me and got mad at him - I was already giving him the silent treatment for ignoring me to cry or hold me just to cry, like I was ok taking care of his tears at first but now it's just crazy. Well Konan suggested he watch a cartoon Aunty called a uhh..Annie moo? Anna May? Well you see I thought it was going to be more cat girls, or about how bad they are.

Boy was I wrong. Boy indeed.

Konan fed me and gave me lots of attention and snuggles before she left, but when she did I decided to see what my Danna was up to. He was sitting at his laptop all hunched up so I went to check and see what he was watching, but I was not surprised because all I saw was a cartoon about cat girls. Like c'mon Aunty Konan, really? Well thats what I thought yeah.

As I watched I realized it turned out to be about cat BOYS, big and small. I didn't catch what it was about but wow they did all touch each other a lot. I don't know why Danna was so entranced by this. I'm a cat. I'm a boy. Why does he need to watch Anna May cat boys? Danna spent so much time watching it that every time he looked at ME he would cry about how I'm not a cat boy yeah.

Excuse me Danna, I'm a REAL cat boy. Those things on the laptop that you're so obsessed with that you won't let me climb on the computer and sleep on your hands anymore cause you're watching them aren't real. Deidara is real yeah. Also for Aunty Konan, what good did this accomplish? It was cat girls before and now it's cat boys!

Maybe this gives me..a better chance though...

Oh well.

Danna then started drawing his own cat boy. He even framed one of his pictures and put it by the bed so he could hold me and look at it while he cries. The pictures are nice, but that's only cause Danna is an artist yeah! Anyway, the pictures are of a small skinny blonde boy with long yellow hair and blue eyes. He kinda looks like a girl...and a loser. Why would Danna want to look at that? I'm way cuter.

However, Danna is obsessed with this cat boy and bought a fancy-pink-stick toy and has been waving it around me and saying gibberish and for me to turn into the boy in the picture. Danna, that's impossible and you know it. Whatever happened to just loving me and me only like I loves you and you only? Daaannaaa!

Ok yeah whatever lets get to today...

So I've come to the realization that this cat boy is supposed to be me, hey yeah but why do I look like a giiiiiirl...I gotta admit though, dang he got the hair right! It looks great! However you may be wondering how I've come to the conclusion that this cat boy is me. Well it's quite simple really, what are you stupid? Yellow hair, check. Blue eyes, check. Long lovely hair, check. NOT fat, check - and most importantly is the fact that the new picture of the cat boy in front of me is wearing the same awful dress as I've been forced to wear right now yeah!

So Danna has issues that we need to take care of... I've also laid claim to the fancy-pink-stick toy cause it lights up all pretty and glowy and twinkles and it's fun to play with. Danna didn't want it back after I took it to the litter box and peed on it anyway. Ugh I just wish I was out of this stupid dress, yeah! Dresses are not made for mighty cat warrior!


	8. Taking care: Singing

This is short and not very good.

* * *

Me me me meeeee~ da da Danna what are ya d-d-d-doin? Tra la la dee doo cook is what you do do da da Danna you you ya you should take out la la la la da dee thee traaaash, it's beginning to stiiiink! Meooow~

Dada daaa daaaance Danna is doin daaaance be ba be ba dee I'm getting real tried dee so maybe please stop meow wee la la la. I don't think I caaaan la la la sing much longerrr. Hey baby baby Danna we should ba da la have a s-s-snuggle after we eaaat and also after youuUU showerrr! Ya ya la you smelllll~ meow meow meow meeooww.

Oh! Ok you're done Danna?

...yes he's done!

Ok so Danna was dancing around the house while cooking to no music. He looked really dumb so I decided to sing so he wouldn't look so stupid.

Ugh this house stinks like smelly boys.

The dancing made him happy, so it's not like I could make him stop, but I have to take care of him so I decided to make him look less silly. Besides, he's making lunch-

Oh no~ Falala loo da dee Danna don't start dancing again pleaseee!~ If you la la have time to daance you la la meow la have time to cook lala take out la trash da da de and baaathe!~

Danna bends down and picks me up and presses his nose to mine, "Awww is my little deidara singing to me?"

Hrnnn. Brush your teeth too Danna.


	9. Taking care: High Hunt

Easter and 420 are on the same day this year so why not have a drugged up treat hunt?

* * *

What an exciting day! I think yeah. Really I have no clue cause I'm locked in my bedroom with Konan and SHE'S TOUCHIG DANNA'S THINGS - ok she stopped. Konan knows not to touch SHE'S TOUCHING AGAIN WHAT ARE YOU - wait she's getting up...she's getting something from her purse...OH! Konan brought me super happy fun crazy party plant! I love that stuff yeah.

"Here Deidara-chan! Aunty Konan has something good for you!"

Well she's holding out her hand so nicely..Oh I can't say no to Aunty Konan! I would love to eat some of that crazy happy fun party stuff yeah. She puts it in her home knitted critters she makes and ah mah gash they're so much fun. This. One. Is a bunny. Funny bunny. Yummy bunny. Yeah.

Danna never gives me this stuff. He says he feels uncomfortable dugging his baby. What is he dugging? Does one have to dig in the backyard to make a toy extra fun yeah? I wonder why I'm locked in the room. What is Danna even doing out there?

OH I CAN SMELL SOMETHING YUMMY. what is he doing? I want in. I want to be out there...I feel fuzzy. HAHAHA. I AM fuzzy yeah!

I look over at Konan and I can see she's laughing too. My joke was SO funny. I should tell Danna. He has treats out there, I can smell them, and I bet if I told him my joke he would find it so funny he would give me a treat! SHE'S TOUCHING HIS STUFF AGAI- wait she stopped. She needs to stop doing that.

I can hear them.

I can HEAR the treats.

I feel fuzzy.

Yeah.

I was going to tell Danna something to get treats, what was it again? I CAN HEAR THE TREATS.

Wait, no, I hear Danna. That's cool. Yeah ok he can come get me and I can go out there and listen to those treats a little better. He's coming. He is coming...

!

"Hey beautiful."

"Hi Sasori!"

Whaaaaachooom.

Danna picks me up and gives me a kiss of the face. Man kisses are nice. I could have like, a bamillion and still want more, but they would have to be from Danna... And right after he eats tuna. Man that's hot.

"I called Deidara beautiful, not you Konan."

I am the fairest of them all. DUH.

Aunty speaks up, "Yeah yeah, are you all set out there or were you beginning to wither away being apart from Deidara for too long?"

Danna makes a scary face at Aunty. I don't like it when Danna makes scary faces yeah.

"I'm ready." Konan walks past him toward the living room and Danna whispers to me, "and of course I missed my sweet little brat~"

Aww and more kisses from Danna!

"Hey and Brat, you're kind of floppy..."

flip flop floop.

Danna takes me to the living room where I can see Aunty Konan sitting on one of the stools fooling around with the nasty metal flashy box she points at me all the time.

I can hear those treats calling me. I still had to tell Danna something too... For what reason I don't know...

"Ok brat," Danna kneels down with me still in his hands and looks at me "I put special Easter treats," TREATS? "All around the house. It's your job to go around and find them and eat them all, ok?"

Danna I feel fuzzy.

He puts me down and I don't wanna move. Does he even know that he walks on two legs? How does he do that, I can't even do that and I'm Deidara the Great! Maybe if I flop around a bit I can too mozy about on two legs and be taaaallllll.

Flop flip floop hey everyone look at my belly!

"Konan how much catnip did you give him and WHY?"

so much fun

Aunty laughs, "420 blaze it."

Danna rubs his face..hey if he can rub his face he can rub me! He wanted me to do something..what was it..

"Go find the treats, brat!"

TREATS?

Ok so I can pretty much hear one coming from under the table so letssss mozy on over there. yumyumyum. Now back to Danna.

"Good job Deidara!" They both clap for me.

So I got claps for eating off the floor? Will I get claps if I poop on the floor? Hm, I better not risk it. Danna sprayed me with water the last time I did that.

I can smell another treat. I can smell it, smell it, smell it! In my scratch tower! Yumyumyum. Ok lets go back to Danna. I feel fuzzy...hey that's funny cause I'm covered in hair! Hahahaha!

I'm back at the feet of KonanBonan and DannaBanana hehehe. I kinda just want to roll around now...

"Deidara are you sure you want to roll about?"

Yeaaah my man.

"Or would you rather look for more treats?"

TREATS?

I spend the next FOREVER looking about the house and I think I've had like, a bamillion treats and I'm still hungry. Aunty also kept flashing that monster box at me yeah. My eyes hurt, but i can relax now that I'm lying on the rug and wow I kinda just wanna snuggle now...I don't feel fuzzy anymore but DANNA IM HUNGRY.

"Hey Sasori, did he get them all?"

Ugh yeah, did I win?

Danna counts on his fingers, "No there should be one more actually."

Can you bring it to me, yeah?

"And it's right here!"

What.

"Good hunt today Deidara! We'll do this again next year!" And Danna puts a treat to my face.

Yumyumyum. Look at that! He brought it to me, I can't clap so I'll just flop my tail around...yeah that works.

Danna walks over and fills up my dishes with food and water and brings it to meee.. He takes such good care of meeee!

"Ok Konan you have to leave."

"What? Why?" She asks fiddling with her flashy box.

Yeah I'm done with her too.

"It's nap time." Danna says while gesturing at me.

"And you're going to nap with him I assume?"

Yes

"Yes."

Aunty Konan sighs, "Happy Easter you two."

Danna picks me up, "Bye Konan." and holds my paw to wave goodbye and speaks in a silly voice, "Bye bye Aunty Konan un!"

If that is supposed to be me then - oh who cares goodnight yeah.


End file.
